♥ relatives gathering.

29/11/2012

if you were my close friends you shall know,
 my lovely aunt Angeline had moved to Australia Adelaide for her new life.
fyi, They had planned really long time ago, so don't ask me why things comes so sudden.
I miss them so much, just because we spent lot of time together.

So when they came to KL to attended cousin wedding ,
I try to arrange my time for them even i was having final at the continued weeks.

The Most left hand side with black dress is my aunt ! :)
So on the 29th November night,
My Parents had went to west malaysia to attended another wedding from daddy side relatives.
We stayed here to attended my aunt gathering (:


The first time i brought lenx as a boyfriend identities joined us at Cempaka Lounge with my relatives , My uncles , aunties after Isabelle niece one year old birthday.
You guys know what , i have a damn ROCK families.
even my uncles have two 20+ years old , the second smallest is 16 , the smallest is 7years children, my aunt have three children , and they are 12, 11, and 9years old.
But they still feel they are young ! hahah, like us :PPPP!

You know what ? I wont join friends to clubbing , pub or even lounge.
I only joined my families and relatives , because i know i will always safe when i am with them.
nothings better then families right ? :)
They only wants you to be safe , taught me drinks alcohol to prevent tragedy.
They taught me how to drinks and know where is my limitation.
We are Much more craziest then you thought !

then this was the second time i brought along lenx to my aunt gathering.
No, i should said this is the first time i bring boyfriend to join them.
and i dont know why samboy kept stick with him.

Lenx bought a Fujifilm Instax Mini7 for my Early Christmas pressie !
and i took the second film with my lovely aunt :)
I wont believe a guy with his promises but i believed in what he proved. 
so the day before their flight i gave this film to my aunt , and asked not to forget me.
She said : of course i won't ! Sha derh !
and ya! forgot to mentioned the dress i wore to her gathering is an early Christmas pressie from my aunt too!
she always have the best taste of choosing cloths , she knew my types too :D

Actually i still not get use and cant accept the fact that this christmas without them,
I miss those little ones so much.
maybe i shall accept the fact.
kthxbye.

Happy 10monthsary!

十个月快乐!


对于这些日子一直我都没有急着的
难为你了 九个月来都是你提醒我的

我觉得有你的每一天 都很特别
所以什么多少个月多少个月的就没什么重要了
你知道我没有安全感 把自己越弄越平凡
你知道我父母希望我交到可靠和稳定的男友
而你就转工作 就算很多委屈 但第二天却很快没有事

我任性 耍脾气
功课压力大 觉得很烦
通通都发泄在你身上

我很自私
真的

我总是顾及朋友和家人的感受
但却每次都忽略你的感受

别人说我会平衡爱情， 友情 和亲情
因为各方面我都很幸福!
但我发现我会把各方面都平衡
那是因为我有个不小心眼的男友 (:
不会介意

唯一缺点就是比较厉害吃醋
但是吃醋到不会出面
问了问几句
发现我解释到有点不耐烦
就停口不问 不然就转移话题


你总是不在意别人对我的看法
自由能给的就给
因为你觉得我这种年纪你经历过
我好玩是好玩 但你总是想爸爸的口吻骂了几句
就找点东西哄我

你知道我压力过大
半夜就会醒了无数次
电话都要确定满电
还有一次你醒来发现电话自动关机后
很紧张的问我半夜醒了多少次

你知道一弄我生气
我就可以不接电话 不回信息
让你担心一整个晚上
你就尽量不惹我生气

知道我会做assignments 做到很晚
就说要陪着我一直到我做完为止
就像前天半夜我和同学在家里狂找答案
我一找到答案 就开心的跳起来
你在电话里叫我我却忽略掉 只顾着告诉Nico我的算法.
你却没有闹别扭.
一直到凌晨四点当我要睡觉的时候才发现原来我们的电话还没挂掉
你不会在乎我在你的朋友面前形象会不会好
只是让我放胆的去做我自己

你很爱粘着我
一休息就SMS我 一放工就打给我
我却在乎你身边的朋友 看你这样的举动是什么感受.
我很抱歉 让你两头都为难


十个月来
我听到对你的恶语 我就被受影响
但你对我的谣言 却都忽略掉

十个月来
你兴奋的计划着我们的未来
而我总是冷言冷语的说 “如果可以"
其实我知道被泼冷水的感受
但是只是 我的防备心真的很重很重
我很自私顾着自己心不能让它受伤
但是我却一次一次伤了你的

十个月以来
我对你却很像没有信任
*也是防备心惹的祸
但你却对我信任一直增加

前任脾气很差 也很爱当做那么多人面前和我吵架
都没有顾及我的面子

你知道我很爱面子 很顾面子
你都尽量把面子这回事 留给我

我做工的时候
我说很困 你就买咖啡
我说隐形眼镜干 你就买眼药水
我说我指甲长 你却买指甲剪给我
同事个个说你很疼我 都说我整个公主这样
个个都说我的男友体贴和细心到了极点
在人家眼里你是别人的王子
在我心里却暗暗感激你对我的体贴

要你面对防备心那么重的女生
要你担心我的忽冷忽热
要你当我的发泄捅
要你顾及我的面子
要你担当我的自尊心


虽然我家人还没有反对我们
即使我家人都懂了 但我却还没有正式带你以男友身份回家
我整天都担心我家人的反对
你却整天都说要见家长
有时候看你这样我就心软
但过了一阵子我又害怕回来
又不肯去见你的 又不肯让你见我的
让你一次一次的失望 真的很抱歉
我尽力去重拾回我的信心的
原谅我的任性

黄瑞泉

十个月快乐

希望未来还有未来的十个月

未来的一年

未来的每一年 都有你 (: 

♥ Rainbow in your eyes

*I have to mention before i start this .
This is seriously not an advertutorial :)
True Story.



Play the video above before you start reading this.

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3 years ago , 
The Perete families went through the most toughest moment
before we totally accepted the fact that he was leaving us.
I'm the  first grandchild who watching how my grandpa leaving before the other's came.
The pictures of that day is still on my mind.
*I still remembered i ponteng class because want to accompany mummy to hospital*
the memory  never gone until now.
My Smallest Aunty was hugging me and i felt her fear.
We starred on those doctors whose trying to save him and our heart keep praying for him.
*there were 3doctors if no wrong*
My grandma was coming on the other side with her tears , and fainted.
Until those doctors told us that they felt so so sorry and they already tried their best.
Everyone was finally Collapsed .
I was stunned for 4 or 5 seconds and the tears can't stop falling.


All of My cousins, uncle and aunties were finally came.
While my Cousin sister April reached, both of us hugged each other and crying desperately.
all of us felt hurt.
besides,  all of us waiting for the father/priest.
we calmed ourselves down and done the prayer for our beloved.
The Funeral van was finally here,
Both of my cousins brothers and i accompanied him until the funeral parlor.

Until today ,
we never forget his smile , his action , his laughter, and what he taught us.
especially the moment he  holding the guitar to play and all of us sing together every gathering . 

last few days ,
I was begging boyfriend to accompany me to a park that grandpa usually bring us there to Jogged once i got back.
because Never forget the moment that he brought three of my little cousin ,
My sister , Cousins sister went there to have a jog,
The most awesome moment was all of us was singing nursery rhymes on the car while on the way to the park.

Last few weeks ,
I was facing the most depressed moments that i never had in my college life.
I never tell or showing out to friends or boyfriend until i play less, joke less with them.
Just because can't find anyone right to tell.
or maybe can said this , i dunno what to tell .


Until the day , anniversary of his death.
I dreamed my beloved my grandpa.


I dreamed that my sister and I was in a room.
she went out to balcony to took my shirt , * but My real life room doesn't have a balcony*
she came in with fear and locked up the door directly and said there was a stranger outside.
the stranger knocked on the door and i opened it . *Why am i so stupid. LOL*
He asked me " Where is My Brother?!" with a very fierce expression on his face.
I got shocked and i ran out from my room but in the same time I saw Him, my grandpa and he hugged me directly.

I woke up and called boyfriend directly and my heart pumped very fast.
*Actually i want to called Mummy first but was already midnight.i afraid she will get shock.*
He asked me what happened to me this few days , keep woke up on the midnight.
and i told him what i had dreamed. to be honest , i am sweating when i told him this.
then i asked him , "today... 23rd? izzit 23rd?!"
He stay stunned and said "Yeaaa.. why ?" 
I was thinking izzit 21st of 23rd my grandpa anni.
*I almost forget about it because stressing for few days*
Boyfriend accompanied me and asked me Stop thinking about it..
 have a good night sleep so i could called my mom to asked about it tomorrow morning.

On 23rd of October,
i called my mother and ask her to make sure the date early in the morning.
She asked why and then I told her what i dreamed in the midnight.

she bought my last phone number at sabah 4D.
and the next day my number really out at the special prize.
My mum was so adorable,
called me early in the morning and told me the good news.

After the amazing dream,
i had a good night sleep every night.
the percentage that i woke up in the middle of night was decreased.

So , 

grandpa . Thanks for always being with me.

I think i understand what you trying to message me in my dream . 

This is the greatest dream that i never had.

And ya !
The little girl  on the video is my cousin sister Estee and the father inside the video is my uncle.
the one who singing this is my Smallest aunt!
Support local music please.
share it out  (: